Tantrums are frequent in children. In this way, kids show their dissatisfaction or try to manipulate adults to get what they want.
If tantrums and outbursts of anger in a child appear very often, regularly, and do nothing with them, then after 7-8 years they pose a danger to the child or other people around them, prevent them from building relationships with other children, provoke conflicts and anger in the child due to the inability to control them.
What parents can do (and should not do) to stop child hysteria:
- Let the child “get angry.” You can, of course, be next to the baby in hysterics, but you should leave him alone, do not try to hug or hold him by force (if there is no good reason for this). When an outburst of anger passes, the child usually begins to cry – that’s when you can start communicating or hugging. If the baby cannot overcome anger for a long time, then you should sit next to each other, waiting until the child is the first to express a desire to communicate.
- Preventively reassure. If it becomes clear that the child is about to get out of himself, you should not try to “agree” – this may aggravate the situation. It is better to try to “extinguish” the fuse:
- For this, the youngest children should be asked a few “closed” questions – which need a “yes” or “no” in response. For example: “Are you angry because we didn’t buy candy?”. Be sure to give your child time to answer. When the baby sees that his feelings are understood correctly – he will calm down a little. After that, you can explain why it was done that way.
- With older children, the method of statements works better – this is when an adult in an affirmative form voices an understanding of the causes of a negative reaction, and then explains his own actions: “I understand that you are angry because we did not buy candy, they are very tasty. But we ate candy yesterday, and if you eat a lot of them, they are harmful to health.”
- React quickly to the scandal in public. Children often loudly and emotionally express their indignation in shops, on the street and other public places. In such conditions, there is not always time for conversations and questions, so you should immediately tell the child. that this behavior is not acceptable in this place and if this continues, then you will be forced to leave. It is important to fulfill your warning if the child does not calm down. {InArticle}For example, to say: “We are in the store, here you need to talk in a whisper. If you put on a scream, we’ll have to get out of here.”
- Don’t threaten back. In an emotional fit, children of all ages can often threaten their parents. Sometimes it’s funny and sometimes it’s really insulting. However, we should not forget which of you is an adult and in no case should you respond with mutual threats. After the child calms down, it is worth talking to him about it.
Do not forget that the main goal is not so much to calm a specific tantrum as to teach a child to manage his emotions. Therefore, together with tactical methods of managing behavior, show by example the correct behavior in a conflict or emotionally intense situation.
